I'm sorry my penis didn't work
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
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