If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize
