What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
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he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
Randomize