she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
