im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
Then you guys just all showered together...?
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