I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
Phrase i just heard while watching the U.S. open: "Boy they have really trimmed it well, this has got to be the tightest hole in the Open."
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
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