I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
just ate pastrami before passing out in my hotel room. My room smells like a petting zoo
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
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