Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
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