Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
I just found puke in my bra..
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize
