scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
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