hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
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