well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
I lost the right to judge tonight