Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
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