love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
Why is there uncooked bacon under my bed?
You insisted on taking it to bed with you. You grabbed it out of the fridge while mumbling "If I leave this out, you fuckers are just going to ruin it."
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
