He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
In case you wake up wondering why your eyes hurt... You were claiming to be Zeus and that mortal weapons couldn't harm you. Some chick took it as a challenge and pepper sprayed you. Sorry dude.
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
Randomize
