***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize