Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
Randomize