Come home. Im drunk and cutting my own hair. This is bad, i need you.
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
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