I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
Randomize
