whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
Randomize