We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
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