All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
You stole my car to go to your boyfriends. Now your parents are fucking in the next room at top volume, and I have no way to escape..thought you should know that the amount of therapy I'll be needing for this is expensive.
You're the best friend ever.
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