You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
Randomize
