Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
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