did you get engaged???
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
Randomize
