Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
Randomize