why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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