I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.
I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
This is my gift to your gina
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
we're so committed to being not committed
Randomize
