If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Randomize
