Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
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