you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
Randomize
