apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize