i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
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