My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
So I'm drunk playing pool in a bar with a guy I arrested last week for a DUI...if he recognizes me, shit's gonna get real.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
Randomize