Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
Randomize
