oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
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