Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
I woke up under a house in Key West
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