we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
Randomize
