you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
Randomize