why didn't you poke me back
Pappa wants mamma naked
wat bout pragnant strippers??
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
