If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
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