my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
I can feel your judgement through the phone
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Randomize
