The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
Btw, remind me to tell you about how I had to cancel my crazy wild sex plans with Will b/c my roommate came back from his trip after a day b/c Canada wouldn't let him in. Fucking cockblock.
Actually that's the whole story. You don't have to remind me.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
Randomize
