the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
and i looked up. we had an audience...
He passed out mid-signature
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
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