I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
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