We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
Randomize
