theres a dog humping me and im not going to stop it... i really need to get laid.
You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize
