problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Soap is not a condiment
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
Randomize
