dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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