That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
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