Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I look better un-naked...
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
Randomize
